Why party? Well, to have a good time, of course! That, indeed, is the stereotypical "frat boy" approach to partying. But, that's not the real question being asked here. The real question goes just a little bit deeper than that. What is the purpose of your gathering?
Is it to celebrate someone's birthday? Commemorate an anniversary? Mark a significant milestone? Or perhaps it's just to bring your closest friends together?
You get the idea. Why you're throwing the party will inevitably help shape and structure it as well.
Unique, yet the same.
That's the mantra you need to keep in mind as you plan this event. Perhaps you've been tasked with hosting a small event commemorating the retirement of one of your colleagues. Why did they ask you? They choose you because someone recalled that great small gathering you held at your house several months ago.
That's fine you think. But a small gathering of close friends is easy to plan. A retirement party? That's a bit different.
Yes and no. Obviously, no two parties are alike -- each with its distinct purpose and direction. But when you scratch the surface of a party they all have elements that are the same.
A cocktail party usually has this Yoda-like advice stuck to it: small enough so everyone can sit or large enough to those standing don't feel awkward.
And depending on where you're hosting the event, that's about as specific as anyone can get. But most "event planners" will go one step further and help to decipher the mathematical algorithm behind the sage advice.
For a cocktail party where you'll have people sitting and standing around mingling, professional event planners tell us to allow four to five square feet per person. When counting your space, don't count the total space in a room. Only your available space. You just can't include room used by large pieces of furniture that can't be moved.
Since it is a "cocktail" party, you'll obviously need to set up a bar. You can easily use a table for this -- with a nice tablecloth on top. It goes without saying you'll also need a nice variety of liquor, wine beer and yes, even nonalcoholic drinks.
Not only will you need these to use as mixers with the liquor, but you need to consider what any guests who don't drink alcohol -- or those designated drivers -- may be drinking.
You'll also want to be well stocked in ice as well as appropriate glassware and a few essential bar tools. Later on, I show you a quick and easy method for determining just how much alcohol you'll need for your party. It's really simple, I promise!
Cocktail parties usually last for about two hours. Most of them start either at 5 or 6 p.m.
The Dinner Party
Ah yes, the dreaded dinner party! This type of event can send chills down the spine of even the most experienced of party planner. But you needn't approach it with such trepidation. You'll discover that it can be a wonderful vehicle for people to get to know each other -- and enjoy, hopefully, some very good food in the process.
Are you cooking and serving this party yourself? Then you should seriously consider limiting your guest list to 10 individuals --- no more. If you invite any more guests than ten, then you need to re-evaluate your options. You either need to turn the "dinner party" into a buffet, or hire a caterer to cook and serve for you.
You don't want to add any more stress than necessary to your planning. After all, the day of the party, the time of the party, you want to have a good time too! Remember, and if you're having a good time, this reflects in your guests ability to enjoy themselves as well.
The Buffet
If you're contemplating a long guest list and you want to serve food at your party, then consider hosting a buffet. Much of the preparation can be done in advance. Not only that, but the food service aspect of the buffet is less "labor intensive" than for the average sit down meal.
The only area you must be careful to ensure: Every guest has a place to sit while eating.
The requirements for this type of party are relatively easy as well. All you need is wine and beer as well as nonalcoholic beverages. If you want, you may serve cocktails, but with the buffet style, they're not expected or necessary.
You will also need hot plates or chafing dishes if you're going to serve hot food, as well as professional help to staff them.
You'll also need a sufficient quantity of serving platters, plates, silverware as well as glassware for all of your guests, as well as a large table for the food and a smaller table for drinks.
This kind of party can work when held at any time during the day. You can host a brunch, lunch or a dinner in buffet style. No matter what time you plan your party, you should allot approximately three hours for it.
This type of party is especially good for a holiday or a housewarming open house party. In each of these, you can assume the flow of guests will be staggered. So feel free to invite more people than you would for a traditional buffet.
Oh, I see! There's no expressed special purpose for this party. You're really not celebrating anyone's birthday . . . not commemorating an anniversary . . . not even a housewarming or a going away party.
You merely want to throw a party for the sake of having a few friends over to have a good time. Good for you! But, you're not quite sure where to start. Actually, you say, that's an understatement. You're at a complete loss.
What type of party would
you feel comfortable hosting?
Not to worry! I've got you covered. Let's start with picking your brain a little and see what you've liked and disliked at past parties. Because this is your chance to create the party of your dreams (and hopefully your guests as well).
Today, just about anything goes when it comes to themed parties. Of course, you'll still find yourself to some extent asking all the previous questions: am I serving food? How much and what kind of serving plan, a sit-down dinner or a buffet?
But, the ultimate question is what type of party do you think you'd be most comfortable hosting. If the thought of throwing 8 of your closest friends together at one table for any period of time send you running for cover . . . perhaps the sit-down dinner isn't a good choice.
If, on the other hand, you love to cook and wouldn't mind a few more guests -- as long as they don't mind serving themselves -- then the buffet style is more to your suiting.
Choosing a theme
Now you get to pick your theme. And if you can conceive it, you can probably carry it out. Yeah, it's a lot like in that movie, Field of Dreams: "If you build it, they will come!"
The key to remember about party planning is actually quite simple: Plan the event around your talents, desires and style. If you do this, the party just has to be fun and a big success.
The only exception to this rule is if you're hosting a party to celebrate the birthday or accomplishment of another person. Then the party theme no doubt revolves around him.
You may be planning a party to commemorate a birthday of an older person -- let's say your 92-year-old grandfather who is still in amazing health.
What are his interests? What did you do as young man? What are some of the changes he saw as he aged? This opens up the party to several theme ideas, from a "20th Century party” -- showing the changes that occurred in his life to a more family-oriented theme.
With that in mind, here are some questions you should ask yourself before you decide on the type of party you're planning.
1. What type of parties have you had the most fun at?
2. How do you like to entertain? In a formal or informal setting?
3. How many people can your home handle. Is it a large group, or only a small group?
4. How many people do you prefer to entertain at one time?
5. Is this party for no apparent reason other than to have a good time? Or is it in celebration of a holiday or birthday or other event?
6. Who do you anticipate to make up your guest list, friends . . . family or both?
7. Do you truly enjoy themed parties?
Now the ideas should be gelling a little in your mind on which way you'll be going with this party. No doubt, the themes from which you can choose are limited only by your own imagination.
But here are some ideas to kick-start that imagination of yours. These are only the "tamed" of theme parties. I've known friends to go crazy with these types of ideas. And why not?
Of course, this short list doesn't even begin to do the topic of themes justice. But it will get your creative juices flowing in the right direction.
Where will the party be held?
Now that you're beginning to narrow down a theme, you need to decide the location of the event? If you have enough room in your home and would like to host it there, great.
But maybe you don't want to go through all the necessary preparation for a home-based party. When you hold your party at home, you not only have to plan the party itself, but you have to work in time and energy to ensure your home is clean (and in my case, lots of energy goes into this), and is capable of holding the number of people you're planning on inviting.
This really shouldn't be too difficult of a decision. In visualizing the success of your party -- and its theme -- you probably have a fairly good idea of the location already. You just need to firm up a few details, that's all.
How many people?
This is actually two questions in one. The first asks how many people can the location you have in mind accommodate? The second asks how many people are you planning on inviting?
Don't continue on step forward if you know without a doubt that you plan on inviting more than the location you have in mind can handle. You may think that if you invite 40 but you really have your heart set on a place that can only hold 20 that somehow it will all work out . . . it probably won't.
When you do this, you're really only asking for disaster. So either trim back on your tentative guest list or choose a location that can accommodate more people.
How much can you afford to pay?
If you plan on hosting your party at a location other than your home, discover how much the rental is. Be realistic. Can you afford this fee and still afford all the supplies and accessories you'll need to carry off the party as you envision it?
Now's not the time to start lying to yourself, thinking you can handle this. If you're doing this, you're only headed for disaster, with a capital "D."
Do you want in an outdoor or indoor venue?
And if you do have it outside, what are your plans should the weather not cooperate with you? All valid questions that you'll eventually need to supply answers to.
Is this location conducive to the theme you're developing?
Does the park or hall lend itself to the type of decorating you have in mind for your theme? Or will it require some real work to get the location prepared? Maybe there's a location that's more suited to your creative ideas?
This is a valid point. If you're not sure, ask among family and friends to see if they’ve ever planned a party at this location. Do they think the theme you're planning could possibly be carried out here?
Will your guests have room to park?
This is one of those "practical" questions that might not come to mind in the throes of your creativity. But trust me, if you don't think about it now, you'll be rudely confronted with it on party day. It's better to think ahead now!
Does the location you're considering allow alcoholic beverages?
If you're planning on serving alcohol, then you need to get that clear when you're renting the location. If the proprietors say no, don't even think you can sneak some in. Simple say, "Thanks but no thanks." Then go back to the drawing board to search another location.
Now that you know what you're searching for in a party location, just imagine all the places you may actually be able to host it? Just to give you an idea, I've listed some for you. Perhaps one of these locations, can help you choose a theme too!
Have you ever really thought about throwing a party in a museum? Give it some thought?
And wouldn't the bowling alley be the perfect place for a '50s party for adults? And that's only the beginning of the ideas I bet are popping into your mind as you read these possible locations.
But not only that, you may also be forming a guest list even as write just by thinking about these different themes.
Go ahead! Have fun with all of this. After all that's what it's all about!
In the next chapter, I'll show you how to get your act together before the party begins, so you can enjoy yourself on the day of your big event.
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