Party Planning

By being prepared, you'll going to appear as if you're at ease (because you are!), you're going to enjoy yourself as well, and your guests will ultimately be talking about your party for months!  This chapter shows you there's more -- much more -- to party planning than meets the eye. 

The key to any successful party is being prepared.  Ask any successful host how she accomplished such a successful party -- whether it's a cocktail party or a children's birthday party -- and she'll tell you in one word:  Details.  And indeed that’s Details with a capital "D".

While this whole book is obviously aimed at "planning" your next party, which implies being prepared, this chapter is probably the most important.  It presents step-by-step, in detailed form, how to prepare for the event.

One of the biggest questions most people have concerns timing.  Just when do I start preparing? 

And that's a good question!  The answer, in large part, depends on the time of the year it's scheduled.  If your party is planned around a major holiday then give yourself a full month -- four weeks -- to pull it together.

You'll also need four weeks if you plan on renting any accessories or equipment for the party too. 

Otherwise, two weeks should suffice if your plans are less complicated.

The only time you can prepare for a party in a week is if it's a potluck party, where everyone brings a dish to share.  That takes quite a bit of pressure off of you as the host.

All the details I'm describing in this chapter may not apply to your specific party.  But you can sift through those that do.  This gives you a fair idea of when you need to begin taking care of these tasks.

Thinking . . . and planning two to four weeks ahead

The first thing you need to do is create a budget.  You'll need a realistic idea of how much you plan to spend.  This is important.  You'd hate to come up three days prior to the party, realize you need an important item only to discover you've spent all your money for the week.

A budget doesn't mean you have to be "cheap."  It just means you need to know how much you're planning on spending.

Your second task is to create a guest list.  The size of it of course depends on the type of party you're creating and the purpose of the event as well.

So you know the type of party you're hosting.  Now it's time to create a guest list.  The length of your guest list depends on the type of party you host. 

If you're hosting a dinner party in which all the guest sit at the same table at the time, put quite a bit of thought into who you'll include.

Let's visualize the scene.  Each of your guests is sitting at the table, elbow to elbow from the serving of the appetizer and salad to the dessert and coffee.

Now, you may think that if you invite all the brilliant conversationalists you know, you'd have a great party.  But if you do that, who would listen?

Include both individuals who can start a conversation at the drop of a hat, by all means.  But also include an equal amount of good listeners as well.  This gives you a great blend of talkers and listeners

As you draw up your guest list, you'll naturally include individuals who you find interesting.  But you must also consider if your guests will find them interesting as well. I know not all of my friends share my interest in metaphysical topics, nor do all my friends even think internet marketing is remotely interesting.  So I wouldn't include these friends if the bulk of my guest list is made of either group.

It's best to have a well rounded mix of guests, with interests and backgrounds.  If one of your guests think the person to her left is a bore (being completely blunt about it) she can always turn to the right to start a conversation with him.

The other quality of a good guest list is it incorporates both couples and single individuals.  After you create the list, check it again.  If your list only includes one single person amid a sea of married couples, then cross him off the list.  You don't want him to feel like awkward.

The "daring" guest list

When you're creating the guest list for either a cocktail party or a buffet, you can be a bit more daring in your choices.  In these situations, don't be afraid to mix it up a bit.  I've found that this is the perfect setting to invite not only very old, trusted friends, but those people I'd like to get to know better.  Not only do I enjoy myself this way, but those attending also seem to enjoy the diversity of interests.

Since no one is "trapped" sitting at a table next to the same people all evening long -- like at a sit-down meal -- people can mingle with more freedom to seek out those they find interesting.

Don't wait till the day of the party to realize that you may have trouble juggling the duties of host . . . caterer . . . babysitter . . . and any of the tasks that are involved in your style party.

Visualize your party, and think through all the real needs of the event and be realistic.  Don't be afraid to ask close friends and relatives to help ahead of time.  What's the worst that could happen?  They may find that they're not as busy as you anticipated them to be and they can abandon their posts -- at least a portion of the individuals.

So exactly what do you put into an invitation?

The format of an invitation is basic -- even though they may come in a variety of shapes, sizes, and through a variety of media.  A good invitation supplies your guests with everything they need to know in order to come on the right day, the right time, baring the essentials, and dressed properly.

Having said that, here are the major essential aspects of any good party invitation:

The purpose of the party.

Is it a birthday party?  If so, for whom? 

Is it an anniversary party?

Or just a "let's-get-together-to-have-fun" party?

The name of the honored guest.

The name of the host

Date of party

Time.

Location of party.

If you feel that some guests may not know how to get to the location, then include a map.  This may be especially critical if you have out-of-town guests.

Do they need to bring anything?

If it's a potluck event, for example, you need to request them to bring something.  With a potluck, it's an event just as the name implies.  The guests know that the meal will be really a matter of "luck," depending on what everyone brings. 

But if you want to eliminate some element of chance, you may want to assign at least categories of food to guests.  For example, you could request a certain number of guests bring a dish that contains some type of meat.  This could function as an entrée.

You may want so many other guests to bring various salads, or other side dishes and desserts.

But you know, much of the fun of a potluck, is just waiting to see what shows up on the table.  Chances are without even assigning categories, you'll have a wide variety of food.

Also this would be the part of the invitation where you let them know if it's a "BYOB" party -- Bring Your Own Bottle.  If alcoholic beverages are allowed on the premises, but you're not supplying them and you don't mind people bring their own . . . let them know in this manner.

The theme

If the party has a theme, specify that.

How to dress

Give them some idea of what to wear.  Tell them if it's an outdoor picnic that shorts are acceptable.  Informal?  Jeans acceptable?  In an earlier chapter we talked about what the difference are in formal and informal attire for the more structured parties.

If it's a costume party, you should let them know, as well.  If costumes are optional, tell them this in the invitation as well.

The type of food being served.

Again, whether a lunch or supper will be supplied or whether cake and ice cream are just going to be served.  This allows the guests to plan their meals.  Some individuals may assume a meal will be served, when in fact it won't.  Imagine coming to a party with a hearty appetite and only seeing snack foods!

Your contact information.

Include not only your telephone number, but your email address as well.  These days, getting in touch with a person takes several forms.  And for many people, zipping off an email is easier than placing a call.

Choose a location.  Are you going to have the party at your home?  Or are you going to hold it at another location . . . in a local hall . . . in a theme oriented location . . .

We've already talked about this is more detail in Chapter 1, when we talk about different themes for parties.  You may want to read that portion of the chapter over again.   This really is a piece of the planning you want to have in place before you get too involved in the detailed planning.

Another aspect you'll need to decide on two weeks ahead of time (or four weeks depending on the time of the year) is a menu.  You'll want to choose appetizers, the entrée, all side dishes as well as desserts and beverages.

Send out invitations two weeks before the party.  If the party is planned near a major holiday, you'll want to give your guests four weeks notice.

Are you planning on cooking the meal yourself?  Do as much as this ahead of time.  Right now, create a realistic timeline for the cooking.

Can you make something ahead of time and freeze it without sacrificing quality?  If you can then, by all means go ahead and do it. Not only does this minimize your stress, it frees up valuable time you'll need for other tasks as party day gets closer.

You'll be surprised at how planning in detail this one item alone can take much of the worry out of the planning.

If the event is to be potluck and you're not creating the entire meal, it's not too early to assign what guests are bring which dishes.  There are two reasons for this.  First, you already know what to expect - and they'll be no duplication in dishes.  But beyond that it's a courtesy to your guests.

Now if they wanted can plan ahead of time, they are now able make the meal, freeze it and be worry free the day or two before their visit.

Don't wait to rent vital items!

This is also the time you order any rental items, like plates, cups, coffee urns, chairs . . . need I go on? 

This action is especially vital to take early if you're planning your party during a major holiday.  If you wait too long you may just find that the items you had planned on aren't available on that date.  Then you're in real trouble.

Were you considering hiring temporary help for the kitchen, serving or bartending for the party?

If you need to this time period -- two to four weeks prior to the event -- would be the perfect time.

Two weeks before the party date

Your party is two weeks away.  There are three steps you need to take to help prepare you.  First, if you're not renting any of the silverware or glasses or other serving pieces, now's the time to assess what you have. 

You need to make sure you have enough of everything.   If you don't, you still have to seek out rentals or find friends or relatives who do.

If you're giving party favors to guests, this would be the time to start assembling them.  This is also the period in which you begin to put together any party music, games you may be planning or any other entertainment for the evening.

One week . . . and counting!

It's one week till party day . . . oh, but then who's counting?  Oh, yes, you're absolutely counting!  Nervous?  Ah, that's normal.  But as long as you've been preparing during this time period, you're going to be fine. 

You only have three tasks this week.  The first is to review your menu preparation timeline.  Make sure you're on the mark with where you thought you would be. 

Do you need to play "catch up" with any the items?  If you need to make some portion of the meal and store it in the freezer, now's the time to do it.  If you wait any longer, you really run into a time crunch . . . and a huge stressor.

Secondly, purchase your non-perishable items for the meals this week.  Not only that, but purchase anything you may need.  Think any candles you may want to use or if you need firewood or any accessories for the party.

Now we have three days to go!

The party date is creeping up on you.  Are you ready?  Actually, you really are.  There should be just a few items left to do on list.  If you haven't done so already, and the party is being held at home, complete cleaning your house.  There may be a few things around the house you'll save till the day before the event, but now would be a good time to do the general clean up and scrubbing!

Using your own silverware?  If it's real silverware, this would be the perfect time to polish it.  If nothing else, it'll help relieve you of some of that nervous energy!

Now, we're getting closer . . . and closer . . .
Two days to go!

The party is only two days away.  You can do several diverse tasks to get you feeling as if you have everything under control (because, yes, basically you do!). Go ahead.  Now's the perfect time to go buy your fresh meats.  Plug your digital camera in; get it charged up.  (There's nothing worse than thinking the batteries have enough life in them . . .) 

If you still have some nervous energy you'd like to disperse, then check out your wine glasses or other glassware.  This is the perfect time to give them a final wash.

Wow!  Can you believe it?
One day to go!

 'Twas the night before the party and all through the house, you can hear the host pacing, irritating his spouse. (My apologies to Clement Clarke Moore!)

It's the day before the big party.  You're pacing like a caged animal.  Instead of wasting all that energy by worrying, why not prepare a few things in advance? 

Surprised?  Did you really think that the muses of the party realm wanted you to wait till the day of the party to do everything?  Hey, there are a quite a few tasks you can check off your list the day before the party. 

Below are just a few of those.  If you can think any another else that pertains specifically to your party, forge ahead with it.  Anything -- anything at all -- that lessens your anxiety on the big day should be done a day ahead of time.

If it's a sit-down dinner, set the table. This is just one less interruption you'll have the day of the party itself.

Last minute housework.   If you're hosting your party at your home, complete everything that needs done in the way of housework the day prior to the party.  I have this recurring nightmare that I'd be in the middle of cleaning on the big party day . . . get lost in time . . when the door bell rings.

I answer it, apron on, scruffy clothes underneath, only to find I totally lost track of time and my guests are already there.

Clean your refrigerator.  What?  Yeah, trust me on this one. Clear it of all the old stuff.  This is done for two reasons.  First, if your fridge looks anything like mine, it's a disaster.  You'll be able to actually find the food you buy for the party -- and get to it easily.

And if your fridge is anything like mine, you just may have a few things dying way back there in a dark corner.  It would be embarrassing to have someone else find it --- or smell it!

Now, you have room to do go shopping for all the perishable foods you'll need for tomorrow.  Again, why rush around on party day, worried about the time, when you can finish your shopping the day before with a little less pressure.

If you're really pressed for time and you have this option, buy your groceries online and have them delivered.  Now you don't even have to leave your home!

Another task you can perform the day prior to the party is to wash all your salad greens and herbs in cold water.  Shake these dry then simply place them into polythene bags and refrigerate them.  This keeps them fresh and crisp for about 24 hours.

Now here's an eye opening suggestion for you.  Depending on the menu items you've chosen, you may even be able to do the bulk of the cooking and preparation the day before the party as well.

You do want to be careful in performing this task, however.  The last thing you want to do is compromise the quality of your foods.  But if you know without a doubt that cooking a specific item ahead of time will not affect its taste, go right ahead.  Remember to do everything and anything that will take the pressure off of you the day of the party.

Go to the grocery store or farmer's market to buy your fresh produce.

Planning on using flowers?  Today would be the day to buy them and arrange them.

Go ahead!  I see you're dying to do it.  Run that sweeper on more time!  You'll also want to take out that dust cloth one more time.

Make time to go through all the bathrooms to make sure you're well stocked in everything your guests may need.

It's here!
Party Day!

Yes, it's finally here. So where do you start with your tasks. Well, today you run to the fish market to buy your fresh seafood.  You also take delivery of any rental items you may need.

Buy any ice you'll need for the event, chill your beer supply and any wines that need it.  Make the punch if you're having some.

Don't forget to garnish those party trays with fresh herbs, edible flowers and any fruit you'd intended.  And put any "finishing touches" you may need on the decorations.

Wow!  See why you need to keep on task during the two weeks before the party?  With everything you did the weeks leading up to this day, you still have a full day today!

Now, if you can get your spouse or children to do some of the running . . . pick up the rental items or buy the ice . . . by all means have them do these things.  It'll save you time and stress!

Now, eat something light quickly.  Take a shower, get dressed . . . put some music on and start having a great time!

General Tips On Creating the Perfect Party!

One of the most important aspects of any party -- and this just doesn't pertain to adult parties -- is ensuring there's enough room in your house to accommodate all of your guests.

Take a good look at the room or rooms you plan to host this event in.  Realistic survey them, imagining them filled with the number of people you're planning on having. 

Now ask yourself what needs to be done to ensure there's room for everyone.  If you think you need the room, don't be afraid to move some of the larger pieces of furniture. Place this on your checklist.  Then place a few names of trusted friends you can count on to help you accomplish this.

And don't wait till the last minute to ask them.  Give them ample warning.  Ask them well in advance if they would consider helping.  If they agree, then tell them you'll call them or reminder them several days before you actually want the furniture move.

This isn't because you're afraid they'll try to back out.  It's just a courtesy to remind them.  It also gives you another chance to thank them for their help.

But don't leave this furniture moving for the day of the party.  I don't care how good of a housekeeper you are, you're going to find plenty of surprises under that furniture, from dust bunnies to lost change to discarded and lost cheese puffs . . . and more!

Move the furniture . . .
But keep the warmth!

I'd just like to interject one precautionary note.  Some people move the heavy furniture out of the way and also other, family oriented, decorating items as well.  When they do this, they practically strip their house of any personality and warmth.

If you do this, you might as well hold the party in a banquet hall.  Part of the charm and success of a party is the venue.  And a home's nice added personal touches may help to make the party successful.

And now consider the outside of the house . . .

Yes, that's right!  And I'm not just talking about cutting grass or pruning hedges.  I'm talking about ensuring your guests can find the house.  In making your house stand out, so to speak, you can also begin the welcoming process!

On the evening of the party, ensure that your house is well lit.  This suggestion applies not only your doorstep or front porch or whatever door the guests enter through, but the walkway itself.  A great and easy way to do this, if the walkway isn't already lighted is to use luminaries light.

If you have columns near your front door, string white lights around them.  This adds a little festivity to your party.  It also says that your guests are special enough to be treated to such decorating.

If you don't have columns, but railings, string the lights here.

Parking issues . . .
Don't need to be issues at all!

And while you're looking around outside with an eye to the party, just where do expect your guests to park?  It's doubtful whether the driveway will hold all the cars.

Will it be alright if they park in your yard?  Let them know ahead of time.  If parking on the street is allowed, then just be sure you inform your neighbors, it's only a courtesy.  Perhaps one or two of them may even offer their driveways for parking.

Enter! Enter!

There's nothing more awkward than entering a home, having a coat and not knowing what to do with it.  Why not place a coat rack in the hallway or entrance on party day?

If you normally don't have one here, move one from another room.  If you have move something to make it fit, that's alright.  It's well worth the movement to make your guests feel at ease upon entering.  An awkward moment here can easily carry over to the rest of the evening.  And a party . . . well, it's all about enjoying yourself.